Hi, and welcome to my blog, where I document my life as a photographer and content writer. Earlier in the year, I wrote at length about my return to photography after a couple of years off. I was forced to stop photography, writing, and much of my life due to a spinal issue. From around February onwards, after a near-complete recovery, I found myself in an intense creative state where I was getting out almost every day with my camera to walk and explore once again. I was also able to get back into writing and started up my blog and writing for clients once again. 

In short, my creative hibernation had come to an end. Euphoria replaced the stress and worry that I wouldn’t be able to engage my creative brain. The weather was warm and sunny, and I loved nothing more than getting out and about with my camera, exploring the streets of Prahran, South Yarra, and the city centre of Melbourne. I shot thousands of photos over the past months and loved every opportunity. From a writing perspective, I documented many of those outings and explored my journey of Rediscovering The Light. 

I continue to write a weekly entry to my blog series here. My writing work for my clients has been equally consistent, with several regular articles completed each week. As mentioned in recent blog entries, I’ve received a constant stream of cameras and lenses from Fujifilm Australia for me to test and write reviews. I’ve taken each camera and lens out and about to ensure I test them thoroughly and write honest down to earth reviews. From that perspective, I’ve been really busy with my photography as I test the cameras, capture a range of shots with them for the article, and also take interesting product shots of them. And I’ve just been informed that more are on the way.

So on that front, I’ve been really proactive and motivated to take photos. However, as the warm days have vanished and winter sets in, my motivation is failing. Not the work stuff, just the personal photographic stuff. Where a month or so ago l was keen to get out and hunt light, now I feel unmotivated and uninterested. Keep in mind that it’s winter here in Australia, and Melbourne has experienced a particularly cold start to the season. While it takes a while to heat the house up in the morning, the desire to leave the relative warmth and comfort is nonexistent! 

I typically start the working day early as I like to get a few chores done before I get my youngest up and get him ready for school. I don’t so much as get him ready, as herd him along to make sure he gets to school on time. Then, once he is out the door, I sit at my desk and make a start on my work day. I am far more productive and fluent in the morning when writing articles. On a good day, I can write the first draft of a 2,000-3,000 word article by midday. I stop around then for a lunch break before sitting back down to write some more. Sometimes I can be as productive after lunch, but other times I don’t have the same flow of brain-words-fingers-type. 

Earlier in the year, I would finish my writing and then look out the window to see what the light was like. Regardless, I would grab my camera and head out the door for a couple of hours. At the moment, I have very little motivation to grab my camera and head out in the afternoon. Even on the mornings when I don’t plan to sit down at my desk to write, I would rather stay at home. I know it’s not my mental health slipping that’s causing the motivation to drop. I’m in a great place mentally and clearly have the right drive to get work done. 

While it is winter here in Melbourne, and we’ve had some shockingly cold days, there’s been little rain and even many sunny days. So, my lack of motivation isn’t due to flat, dull, gray days or a lack of good light. The desire to get out and shoot street photography is dormant at the moment. What adds to the complexity of this funk is that after I’ve done my work for the day and done some chores around the house, I feel quite bored. Yet the light still doesn’t call to me.

I guess in recent weeks I’ve been pretty busy testing and reviewing cameras and lense. When I’m sent a camera or lens from a brand like Fujifilm, I typically have the items for around ten days. Perhaps it’s that I’ve not had the time or spare energy to get out with my own cameras and simply walk around taking photos. Or, given the pace at which I’ve produced content recently, I’ve used up all of my photographic credits on work.I think that’s what baffles me the most. How can I be motivated to write about all things photography, attend photography related events, and get out and take photos for work, only to not be motivated to pursue the light for pleasure. 

I know I should be patient and ride out the selective photography funk until I feel motivated again. I’m probably being hard on myself and not recognizing that I’m still being very creative and productive. However, I can’t help but feel disappointed in myself for not being more driven or not forcing myself out the door with a camera. I’ve even packed a camera in my bag when I’m heading out to do some shopping or errands. But even then, despite knowing the camera is there, I opt to not take it out. I see a scene or potential composition, consider taking my camera out, but choose to walk away instead.

While I’m mentally fine, and still being very productive, I feel irritated with myself that I’m not ticking off my daily goals like I did earlier in the year. Also, as I’m not getting out, I’m not exercising as much as I did. I don’t want this to be read as a pity fishing exercise – that’s not the point of this entry. I’m simply exploring, navigating, and documenting a stage in my creative process. Does anyone else get this way during winter? How do you work through a photography or creative funk?